The Great "FROG v. TURTLE" Debate of 2006

Let me set the scene. It was Lucy's first day of school. She found that she had a turtle in her classroom. Isabel has a Frog in hers. Let the debate begin...

Debate Participants:

• Lucy - 2 years old; Position = Turtle
• Isabel - 4 years old; Position = Frog

Debate Moderator:

• Dad - 4 years experience
  

Debate Transcript (and scoring):
Isa: I know her name is Lily
Olivia: Huh... Daddy... What... (Lucy -1, flustered)
Isa: I will call your frog Emma (Isa +2, taking control & changing the rules of the debate. Priceless. Future politician)
Olivia: I wanna call her Shelly! I wanna call her Shelly! I wanna call her Shelly! (Lucy + 1/2, getting into the mix)
Dad: What's your Frog name... er... what's your turtle's name? (-2, obviously not prepared with the basic facts)
Olivia: Shelly
Dad: Shelly? Wha... Describe your turtle
Isa: You know it's my tutrle (Isa -1, talking out of turn: easy way to seem too agressive and lose the crowd)
Dad: Where does your turtle live, Lucy?
Olivia: In... In the... In my box and it's way high! (Lucy + 1, making up facts that Isa can't contradict. Well played)
Isa: I have to tell you something... you know one of mine... one... my frog does? My frog acutally lies around and eats...
Olivia: No... I don't want (Drowning out Isa) (Lucy -1/2, talking out of turn, but obviously in defense)
Dad: Let's go one at a time. Lucy... we'll go... Lucy, let's wait. Isabel, you don't have a turtle what do you have? (-1, who is this moderator?)
Isa: Froggy
Lucy: You have a Froggy?
Dad: Lucy...
Isa: Froggy eats grass (Isa +1/2, last minute detail could throw off her competition)
Dad: Lucy, do you know what... what does the Turtle eat, Or where does the Turtle... does he swim? (-1, he won't be back for the 2nd debate)
Olivia: uh hmm... I want to tell mommy (Lucy -1, flustered)
Dad: OK. Tell yours. It's your turn now. Let's say something about your turtle.
Olivia: I want to tell Lilian (Lucy +1/2, good stalling tactic)
Dad: You're going to tell Lily about the Turtle?
Olivia: Yeah... At the... At the Home... At my Home. And... (Lucy -1/4, stalling becoming obvious)
Isa: Lucy, It's not your home it's everybodys. (Isa +4, best point-counter-point so far)
Olivia: Isa I'm... Isa! Meow Meow wants to teach. He's moved up... (mysterious whispering) (Lucy +2, microphones didn't pick up whatever she said. Could have been anything. Even an idle or realistic threat. Maybe Lucy knew the wereabouts of a certain Little Mermaid doll that would be delivered back safely, if... and it's a big if... Isabel started throwing the debate)
Isa: I want to tell you something about my Froggy now (Isa +2, didn't take the bribe. She's in it to win it... Little Mermaid doll and all)
Olivia: No00000... (Lucy -2, you can't ever let them see you sweat)
Dad: It's Isabel's turn. Tell me something about your Froggy Isa.
Isa: My Froggy sits in the water and sings about...
Olivia: Ugh! Ugh! Ugh! (Drows out Isa) (Lucy -1, she's falling apart)
Dad: Lucy, wait your turn.
Olivia: Ugh! (Lucy -1, debate seems to be in Isa's hands)
Dad: Put your hand up if you have something to say (Lucy raises hand and waves it dramatically) (Lucy +1, she still believes in her cause)
Isa: ...and my froggy says... ah... jump in the water... Pete. And the froggy jump in the water. And then the froggy go under. And then the froggy swim around.
Dad: Oh, thank you.
Isa: I'm going to tell mommy that. (Isa -1, you had us at "hello")
Dad: Well wait for... Lucy, do you have something else to say about your turtle.
Olivia: My Turtle's name Shelly and he's this small... and he's this big and he's getting older and older, Isa. (Lucy +1, out of no where. She's back in the game)
Isa: Actually my kitty's Shelly. (starts singing) Kitty is mine Shelly. Kitty is Shelly (Isa +1, ruthless)
Olivia: No! Mine's Shelly (Lucy +1, hurt but still fighting)
Dad: Lucy, your done. Isa, do you have something to say about your Froggy..
Isa: Actually, my kitty's Shelly (Isa -1, repeated low blows turn the crowd)
Olivia: My Kitty
Dad: Now Lucy, do you have something to say about Shelly the Turtle? Does he... What does he sit on?
Olivia: He didn't sit on my rock anymore! Didn't sit... I suppose Isa....
Isa: Lucy you looked at my froggy and saw he was this big!
Olivia: He... and he looked for food and I can't find... and he... and...
Isa: Lucy could you pick that...
Olivia: No.
Isa: Kitty has a pink nose
Dad: OK, are you guys done? Is there anything else that you want to say? If you want to say anthing else about your turtle or your frog, raise your hand
(both hand raise in the air)
Dad: Alright, Lucy you just went so it's Isabel's turn. And you'll go next, Lucy.
Olivia: Ugh... (Lucy +1, spunky)
Dad: Wait your turn. Raise your hand.
(hand straight in the air) (Lucy +1, double spunky)
Isa: Kitty cat jumped in the water and played with your... his friends... all morning day. Kitty cat says that. All morning.
Dad: Anything else?
Isa: I... Kitty... the cat... sits on... uh.. uh... uh, a rock and jumps from rock to rock. (Isa -1, R...A...M...B...L...I...N...G)
Dad: Lucy. Ok Thank you Isa. Lucy, do you have anything else to say about your turtle?
Olivia: Mine... It's top. Just stick up the... up... up the ceiling and... and it's rocks. And Shelly swims. and, and the deep, deep, deep, deep rocks. And it's hard to swim. (Lucy +1, you could tell her staff trained her on that, but she pulled it off. Flawless performance)
Isa: Lucy, and your frog not... da... a... bigger and... and touches the ceiling because that would be impossible. Then the frog would take up the whole room. (Isa +3, well prepared. Strong counterpoint)
Dad: Isabel, she's talking about a turtle not about a frog. You've got the frog. OK? She's got the turtle. (-5, Moderator credo: facilitate the debate, don't enter the debate)
Olivia: My Turtle... and... one years old. And he is... all older than that. He's... big. And... And why you going my school? (Lucy +10... Slam! da du-du... da du-du.... Slam!)

Tally:

• Turtle: +13.75
• Frog: +7.5
• Moderator: -9