> "Hi. I'm Dave, & I'm a Nintendo Fan Boy"

> (the speaker, a tall & handsom man, sits down)
>
> Crowd (seated in circle): "Hi, Dave."
>
> ----------------- End Scene (fade to black; opening credits roll) ------------------

That's right. I know the circumstances of my own reality. Think someone you love may be afflicted (or just want some ammunition when make fun of me), following are the details of my psyche...

• Nightmares: Told the wife on Tuesday that I was having nightmares & didn't sleep well. Didn't tell her that the nightmares were about not being able to buy a Wii. The dream-plots ranged from forgetting my wallet after waiting 6 hours, to sleeping through when the consols were handed out, to getting to Walmart only to find the queue was already full (fyi... the last one became a reality).
• Heart-ache: After racing half-a-dozen cars into the Walmart parking lot, and foot racing eachother to the gaming section (picture the lamest speed-walking race, ever). Once there, all us NASCAR-wanna-bees find out all 40 spots were taked. When did the queue fill... @ noon. Since we all had watched the UM v OSU game, we were way too late.
• Hyperthermia- Stage 1: In a polo, a fall jacket, breathable running shoes & jeans... I debated sitting in the Best-Buy line. At 7:30pm, I secured the 20th seat, and was feeling confident as there were 60 units. I felt I could take the 20 degree weather until midnight. By 8:15, I was numb. Then the manager came out to remind us that they weren't selling at midnight... they were selling at 9am. That's when it got a hellava lot colder & I threw in the towel.
• Recovery: After Best-Buy, I hit Chipotle & decided to find out the skinny@ Target... 39 units, go on sale at 8am, nobody in line. Golden. Go home, throw back a few with BK & rest up for the big day.
• Hyperthermia - Stage 2: Wake-up at 3:30am & hit Tar-Jey. Armed with snowboarding gear, cubs blanket & MP3 player, I pull into the lot a little before 4am. You've got to be kidding me. There's a line... a long line. And there's lots of cars in the lot. Noooooo... I sheepishly ask what number they're at... 30. Three-Zero, Baby! Spirits lifted, I grab my spot in line, sleep a little, listen to some tunes, & slowly go numb. BK's hand warmers fend-off just enough cold to carry me over until 7am, when tickets are handed out. By 7, my feet are completely numb. How cold was it? Cold enough where not only car windows frosted over, but the tents, sleeping bags, and even my poor little cubs blanket was covered with winter's dew.

> --------- (Fade-in; sun rising over a non-descript parking lot) -----------
>
> ( Focus changes to reveal lead character emerging from store triumphant )
>
> ( Cue music "Blackbird"; Closing credits begin to roll over picture )
>
> ( Camera doesn't move; car starts & slowly drives off frame )
>
> "fin"